Ted Gresham – April 2026

Now about this guy named Jesus Christ

He’s often called “Savior” or “Messiah” or whatever. To me the non-existent “son-of-god” is a pain in the ass.

Once a year a holiday comes around called Easter. All the good Christians get dooded up and go to some church. For many it’s the only day they go. There is a lot of singing, “praising God” and kids picking up colored eggs hidden out in the yard or lawn or wherever. Some churches have “dinner on the ground,” which means they get together and share a meal where each of them has brought one dish. It’s a beautiful celebration of a very ugly thing: crucifixion. If they actually knew what that was really like they be a lot less joyous. Ahh, but Jesus ol’ boy went through all that horror just for us! Thank you Jesus. But of course, he got to rise again on the third day.

When I was a kid…

Easter was a very big thing. We got all specially dressed up and went to sing and praise Jesus. My family always went to a Southern Baptist church so the program was not too wild. Often there was some kind of Passion Play. Of course we had decorated a couple dozen boiled eggs before hand. After church they were hidden out in the church yard. Us kids would dash outside and scramble to find as many eggs as we could. We put them in our Easter wicker baskets which were often decorated. When the hut was over were were free to eat those eggs. I ate the yolks out of mine and tossed the white stuff. It was so much fun and excitement. Yipee.

Ham

One funny story here. Those “dinners on the ground” were always interesting. Some people, almost all women, fixed up their best dish and brought it. Some of them were great. Some were weird. Some I did not touch.😮

There was one of those occasions, don’t remember if it was Easter, that they gave out sandwiches. Ham sandwiches. Thick slices of yummy ham. I grabbed one and went outside to eat it. I took a big bite. Well, I tried. The ham was so tough I could not bite through it. There I stood in front of everyone holding a sandwich stuck in my mouth. I remember I slowly turned away from the crowd, gripped the sandwich with both hands and ripped. I got that piece of ham which I chewed for forever before I could swallow it. The rest of the sandwich went into the trash. I was very disappointed.

So Ask Me Where Is My Wife…

When I began writing this little vituperation of Easter my wife was in church. She was invited to go by my daughter. 😒 They went to the mini-Mega church, Timber Creek Church, a nice big watered-down version of Christianity where all is Joy and Happiness! 😇 It is the church that replaced First Assembly of God, where I spent quite a few futile but passionate moments. I swear. My wife clings to her religion with both hands. She’s not showy about it though. But my daughter! She was raised by me, the atheist. She did not escape the contempt I have for religion. But alas, people are often persuaded by friends and groups to do and believe all kinds of shit. Very sad.

Easter Is An Example

Easter is an example of how insanity and stupidity can fill a multitude of people and keep them locked up in little boxes. Looking back, I think I had a teeny bit of skepticism throughout my Christian adventures. Something didn’t fit. I struggled so hard. Eventually I figured out it was all bullshit. It was not an easy thing to swallow and it ripped me apart for a while but afterwards my life has been better. The frustrating part is seeing my children get wrapped up in religion. It’s a guaranteed way to get screwed and experience a boat-load of heartache. But alas. Easter. And there they are.